Every step is a brave step

Buckley being super brave

This is Buckley. I've written about him before. I'd argue that he's objectively the cutest dog on the planet, but I don't want to make the other dogs feel bad (let alone their people). Regardless, he's damn cute.

We don't know much about his life before he found his way to us. We know he was picked up by animal control in Everett, WA, on a very, very busy street. We know that he was nervous when he arrived at the shelter. We know that he hadn't been chipped or neutered when he arrived there. And we knew we loved him the second we saw him.

We brought Buckley home on October 1st, 2015 - approaching 6.5 years ago. Honestly, it's hard to remember life before him—part of why is his anxiety. Throughout our lives with Buckley, we've had to learn to live with the way this little dude experiences the world. To him everything is scary. I brought home a lamp today (sans shade). He was freaked out by it. It took a while to get him to creep up to it to give it a sniff slowly. We've had tons of experiences where he has stopped and decided that he has to get home...NOW!!! And the scramble begins.

It's the walks I want to talk about. Something happened during the pandemic. Mr. B became afraid of going for walks. In his defense, we have construction at the end of our street for light rail. This means, for the past 2.5 years, we've had trucks coming up and down the street, people in orange vests and hard hats walking around, noises that are unexplained, vibrating, and more. It's been nuts for all of us. For Buckley especially.

Over the past year, when we'd try to take him for a walk, he'd stop just outside of our gate and freeze. Sometimes he'd want to go across the street to smell the neighbor's yard, and then he'd freeze. It could take some doing to coax him to move to go back home. It was kind of sad.

And then, a few months ago, something happened. He started to venture out more. He began to want to explore. We still haven't made it around the block like we used to, but we make it to the end of the street, come back up, and go to the end of the other street. We've made it across the bustling street by our house. We've gone and explored construction equipment.

Somewhere, along the way, Buckley found his courage. He's starting to develop his confidence. Even though his walks are sometimes cut short, he's excited to take them (honestly, a bit too excited. He's such a creature of habit, we have to be careful about scheduling mid-day meetings because he wants to go).

Today, we went for a bit of a jaunt and made it across 5th Ave, the busy street. He would pause and then take a few more steps, sniffing. Then pause. Then a few more steps. I said to him, "Good job, buddy. Every step is a brave step." It was a good walk.

As we headed home, I found myself repeating that saying, "Every step is a brave step." And then I started thinking about my life. About my clients. About friends. About family. About, well, everything.

I'm not the first to say it for sure...we are living in challenging times. On the home front, things can be challenging simply because of the things we've had to sacrifice because of the pandemic. Nationally, we are in the most divisive times that we've seen in decades (hell, *internationally* this is true). We hear about how the job market is doing well, but everyone I know is overworked and exhausted. It can all feel like just too much. It's all too easy to want to collapse or go on autopilot. Both are reasonable trauma responses, and trauma is a big part of what we are, together, experiencing.

For many of us, we need to find that courage to move and take the next step. Of course, sometimes the best way to deal with the exhaustion and overwhelm is to rest, to set everything down for a minute. Of course, even this is a step, often a step in a direction that is unnatural to us (and maybe even way outside of our conditioning, as we believe that rest = lazy).

Every step is a brave step. No matter how small. No matter how significant. No matter how "productive."

Of course, part of what has made it possible for Buckley—which we haven't gone into at all—is his relationship with us. In other words, his people, his pack. We have his back, and he can feel it. So he's got more confidence. This isn't a solo task. These brave steps don't happen in a vacuum. He's doing it knowing he's not alone.

There it is again, friends. We need one another. Imagine that.

So, what's the brave step? And who's gonna take it with you?